Mommying is hard

This evening has been rough.  The girls came home completely sugared up and that means INSANE.  I have stuck to my guns on the no sugar this week..usually only one thing out of the day they have gotten.  So today when they got filled up with Sprite, tea and jelly beans they could barely contain themselves.  Which meant I could barely contain myself.  I think a few times you might have seen steam coming out of my ears.  I tried to take them to the grocery store and Lexi wouldn’t get in the cart so she was hanging off the side and then when she wanted down, she ran 3 aisles away from me.  Then when we got to the check-out she knocked some displays over.  Oh, and forgot to mention the display she knocked over in the bacon.  I was about to lose my mind just after those 5 little minutes.  And then they asked for a cookie!  I think not!

When we get home they don’t eat well and won’t listen.  I put them to bed early partly because we have church and partly because I just couldn’t take it anymore.  I tell Lexi if they continue to play in bed like they usually do, she’s going to have to sleep in her room/playroom in a sleeping bag.  She’s so wild in bed I follow through with it.  They both calm down and I let Lexi back with Emma and they finally go to sleep after a few trips out to the kitchen to see me and/or get a tissue.

And then all the mommy guilt hits me.  I wasn’t patient enough, I wasn’t strict enough, I was too strict, how could I not enjoy my children, why was I spending time making casserole for Sunday School when I didn’t even cook for my family all day, would I be a bad mother if I insisted no one give them sugar?  Round and round I’ve gone all evening.   And it’s just, I don’t know.  This mommying thing is hard, ya’ll.