So I posted the other day on Emma’s little attitude and it’s happened a few times since then. Even that night she said something and Heather was there and she was like, “Oh, Emma, you’re in trouble!” Tonight it happened again when we were at Wal-Mart. I agreed to buy them dresses since it is getting warmer and they need some summer clothes. Emma fought with me about getting a Hannah Montana outfit, buying a belt and not buying a dress. Lexi had already picked out a dress and jammies and I found some H.M. pajamas for Emma but then she would not pick out a dress. Between all the attitude and nasty looks, I finally said enough was enough and said she wasn’t getting a dress and stuck with it and left without buying her a dress. She continued with the bad look on her face and had her arms crossed and head down pouting in the buggy while we checked out and then was not happy when I wouldn’t stop at Walgreens for chewing gum like I told her we might. She didn’t cry which she normally would if I had upset her. I think she was just mad but she knew I was serious about the attitude so she was silent the whole way home. Her face finally relaxed a bit as I watched in the rearview mirror. I planned to actually take her to Walgreens if she perked up and let go of the attitude but she actually fell asleep on the way and has been asleep since we got home at 7:30. That is REALLY not like her so I know she was tired so that could have compounded the problem tonight but I can also tell that in general she’s going through “a thing”. Not sure why or where she’s getting it from but I know I don’t like it.
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This is going to be train wreck you can’t help but watch.
On Turning 30
In exactly 3 months from tomorrow I will turn 30. When Scott turned 30 3 years ago although he may not admit it he had a little bit of a hard time. I simply could not understand. “30 is SO YOUNG! You have to do what you just did 2 more times! You’re just getting started!” Yeah, well, now I’m sitting right outside the door of 30 and getting ready to knock and I completely understand now.
I DO NOT want to turn 30. I LIKE being in my 20s. It’s old enough to be considered an adult and yet young enough to do many things that “people in their 30s” shouldn’t do. “I’m still in my 20’s” is an easy excuse for getting your belly button pierced or wearing a dress a little too short. 30’s seem lost somewhere in the middle of adulthood…not quite young, not over the hill just blah in the middle.
And I have another theory about why it’s so scary. When you’re a teenager going through high school, plans are made. What college you want to attend, what job you want to land, what kind of husband you want, how many kids, where you’ll live. It’s all thought about. And that puts you about 10 years out into your late 20s. And then…nothing. No one ever dreams about what they’re 30’s are going to look like. Or 40’s and 50’s for that matter. Yeah, some people dream about what they’ll do in their 60’s when they retire but plans aren’t made for those 3 decades where you’re actually raising those 2.5 kids and working your butt off to retire.
It’s depressing really. It’s almost as if any life you’ve planned up until now is just over. No dreams or goals to attain now. The next few years are a big gray cloudy question mark. And, no, it’s not fun to be standing at the door and knocking. Don’t let me in, I’m happy where I’m at, thank you!
So yeah, maybe I’m crazy but I’m not looking forward to it. My brain tells me to make new goals, dream new dreams…what do I want to do for the next 30 years or even 10 years? I have no clue…try not to grow too many gray hairs raising two girls and working a job that is quickly becoming dreadful?
I’m sure I’ll roll my eyes and laugh at myself when I look back and read this when I turn 40 or 50 but for now, someone’s going to have to knock for me because if I do, I’m turning and running back down the driveway.
Bible Study – Dateable Week 1
Tonight started my first week with the youth girls going through the book Dateable. Are you? Are they?. I was a little worried at first when only 2 girls were there but I think we had 8 by the time it was over and expecting a few more next week. That’s a good number for a small group study when there is only one adult.
Overall, it went well. A few of our older youth were being immature at times but that was expected from them. It’s sad some of our seniors act younger than our middle schoolers. Anyway, we had good conversation and I think they were relating to what I was talking about.
The first two chapters we went over basically sent the message, “It won’t last.” No matter what you think about the boy you’re with, statistics show your chance of being married to your high school sweetheart in 10 years is very, very low. Girls are prone to build up this big fantasy world based on something as simple as a look from a guy, much less telling them I” could be with you forever”. They talked about the well-known habit of girls writing their names with the guy’s last names, imagining what their kids would look like and picking out kids names even before they start dating the guy. For a girl, that’s a requirement..if your name sounds bad with his, he’s not even considered. I am almost jesting there. And guys tend to say things to get what they want…it may be physical or it may just be the girl’s attention…so they don’t make it easy saying things that help build that fantasy world. Anyway, none of that means it will last. They might feel like they’re in love because of the world they’ve built, but for those of us married any length of time, you know butterflies have nothing to do with true love.
I love how the book points out that by giving themselves fully to each guy they date and then breaking it off, they are “practicing divorce, not marriage”. That’s so powerful.
I don’t think they get that they will likely just be a number to a guy in 15 years. I told them it’s better to be that one he never had than just another notch on his belt. A few of the girls were scared about being called square (I had no idea they still said that these days) and I said, it’s better to be square than a skank. Yeah, your local youth leader actually said those wise words…but I think putting it in their words helped them get it…and it was alliterated so even better 😉
If they can just get the fact that it won’t last, they can actually enjoy dating..not quit dating, but date in the true sense of the word: have fun, learn what you like and don’t like, enjoy being loved and enjoyed by someone other than family and just enjoy their teenage years. I’m so tired of dealing with boy/girl drama that they shouldn’t even be thinking about, I’d be fine if they got the message “I shouldn’t be dating right now at all” because I truly think some of them need to take a break from it! But hopefully they’ll see there is a balance where they can come out better, happy, respected people from their dating life instead of hurt and broken.
Wow, I could really chat about this for awhile, huh?
I got “good reviews” from a couple girls and actually had a pretty good time chatting with the girls. This particular book we’re doing is much more lighthearted and not exactly a “bible” study but one that teaches them important values nonetheless.
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TweetCloud
I’ve been using Twitter quite a bit the past few weeks and I just did my TweetCloud.
The main words are getting, going, watching, working, bed, home. Yep, that just about sums it up.
Around the house
Hey, guess what hasn’t come in yet?? Our hardwoods! Ding, ding, ding! I don’t know why I got a little hopeful that they’d actually be on time yesterday. Scott was to supposed to call yesterday but never did. I’m hoping he makes another visit to the big orange box to find out when and if they got shipped yet. At least we would know if they’re on the way.
*Update – Scott called and they HAVE shipped and have a date of 4/19 to be delivered.
Also I think we’re finally getting our landscaping friend to come spray some sort of very expensive chemical in our yard today that kills everything but our grass which means our yard is fixing to be dirt. We’re supposed to plant seed soon after doing this so I hope all that rain comes back and we might actually have real grass in our yard this summer.
Scott put new mulch out for the year last weekend and bought the boards to finish our deck around the pool. We still have a few other things on the list like painting the trim on the back porch door and repainting the concrete on the porch.
Whew. Looks like we (as in Scott) has a busy spring around here.