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So things are a lot better around here now. Scott and I are going to see Larry the Cable Guy tonight. Scott had flowers delivered to the house. Three dozen miniature roses. They’re gorgeous. One point for him (or about 3 dozen points). He has been trying so hard lately. Notes left for me in the morning. Surprise dates, presents, the flowers. I love him more just for making the effort.
I do still talk to the guy at work. Almost daily. The subjects of our conversations have changed quite a bit though. Recently we’ve been discussing God and whether he creates us inherently good or bad. It’s brought up other things and honestly, I’ve learned a ton just by trying to respond. I’ve thought through things I have never thought through or haven’t probably since college. It’s so weird with him and I. Sometimes it seems like we are almost the same person, just maybe different personalities. We just seem to approach things with the same thought process even if the opinions are different. Wednesday night he, I don’t know, disappointed me. We were doing an implementation for work and he logged in to the computer from the bar he had gone to after work. He went off on tangents and kept talking like so fast and about things I didn’t ask him about and things you just don’t say like that. Now I know why I can’t be around people when they are drinking. I honestly didn’t feel like I was talking to the same person. It really put a different perspective on a lot of things. Anyway, enough about him!
Lexi has really started to try to say stuff. She’s not too good at it but you can tell she is trying. Last night she tried to say two. She was pretty close on that one actually. Apparently she can do animal sounds. The kitty cat is the cutest. She says mow, mow. She does lion, dog, and kitty cat. She is a ham. So funny when she sticks her tongue out when she is really being funny or silly. She has a fit when people come over. Starts running in place, sticking her tongue out, dancing, trying to do somersaults.
Emma is getting more mature all the time. I mean, as much as a 3 year old can be. We still struggle with whining quite a bit and a little bit of talking back to us. She is worse when she is with MIL. I don’t think because of MIL but because of her cousin that she is always with if she spends time with her. She is quite a handful.
We redid our foyer and hallway. Didn’t know people redid those right? Well, our foyer is sort part of our living room. I added a console table and mirror after painting the foyer walls a very deep brown. I love it. I just want to sit in the foyer now.
So today I’m just looking forward to tonight. I really hope it is good.
The past week has not been fun around our house. Things got kind of out of hand with some conversations with the guy at work. Scott started asking questions and of course I had to answer honestly. He was not too happy. And he was right. He and I shouldn’t have said the things we did. Honestly, it was fun while it lasted but trying to gain back his trust has really sucked. Which I can’t blame but it really stinks for me.
Anyway, the girls have been sick the past couple of weeks. Lexi has really been trying to talk. She says “Door” for Dora and “Baa-Paa” for backpack. She says momma and da-da and says “Ma” for Emma. She was even saying PawPaw last night. She gives kisses now. She opens her mouth and leans forward until you kiss her. It’s SO cute. She did it the first time with Mom. I think she about cried.
Emma is still not going #2 in the potty. It is driving me bananas. She continually surprises us with stuff she comes up with. She is really into Dora right now and still walks around in her princess dress up clothes daily.
D joined the Y over Christmas so we have gone twice together this week. It’s really nice to go with someone who is as into as me, if not more. Hopefully we can keep it up.
D & I went shopping to Charlotte’s really nice mall on Saturday. We had such a good time. I love shopping with her. I still think about one pair of tweed pants at Ann Taylor I want but I was not paying $70 for them. I’ll wait until a sale or at least until I can earn coupons for spending that much.
My friend J is not doing well with her pregnancy. They had found out the baby had a hole in his heart, a cleft lip and maybe other problems and now she is in the hospital at 28 weeks with toxemia and will probably have to deliver tomorrow. I feel so bad for her. I don’t see how she is keeping herself together. She had an amnio done yesterday and the results should be in today. We’re praying for the best.
Things just seem crazy around here.
Lexi got us all sick this weekend in MD. There was beautiful snow on the ground the whole weekend. I wish it would snow just once here. Only if they could get the roads clear quickly, it would be great to see it around town. I just hate being holed up at home after any kind of snow.
Work is as slow as molasses. I’m practically begging for something to do. Tomorrow I’m going to a Christmas lunch at Cheesecake Factory in Charlotte. I only get there once every couple years but it is worth the wait!
Lexi broke part of my camera so I’m having to buy another one. I think I’m going to go for the Canon PowerShot A620. Seems a bit bulky but the reviews otherwise seem to claim it has what I’m looking for.
This weekend was whirlwind of emotions. The resulting argument kind of goes like we’re just friends, but friends lead to affairs, but neither of us want that, well just be careful and let me look over your shoulder just to make sure whatever you’re saying is truthful. OK, that made no sense but just had to get that out.
Scott is supposed to be bringing me Starbucks this evening. He needs to hurry. I’m hungry.
Feeling awfully thoughtful today. We
Feeling awfully thoughtful today. We didn’t do a thing today up here. It snowed all day long. Good thing we decided to come a night early. Just looking out the window at the snow coming down steadily sets up a perfect environment to let your mind wander. And you can see the poem I wrote before shows just that. I have never written a poem in my life. Probably as you can tell. Some of it rhymed, some of it didn’t. The thoughts just would not leave my mind. I tossed and turned for 2 hours trying to take a nap this morning.
So tonight I’m working on my new host while I’m waiting on the Apprentice finale. Not much fun really. I hate trying to get Movable Type working. This ftp program I had to install on this machine stinks too. Which is not helping.
That’s what dreams are made of
Lucky chance
Others danced
We were off
No turning back
Years went by
Learned to fly
Horses drawn
Beaches hot
Sheets blazing
Eyes gazing
That’s what dreams are made of
Every day dawning new
Same old thing for us to do
Something new
Quick how do you do
Blushing face
Words erased
Stolen glances
Sexy dances
Minds on go
Can’t go slow
Aspen winters
Spanish summers
That’s what dreams are made of
Words found out
Efforts spent
Husband’s angry
Wife’s crying
Hearts are broken
Minds are numb
All alone
And regret is sown
Whatever mattered
Is now shattered
That’s what dreams are made of
It looks like the weather
It looks like the weather is going to be pretty bad tomorrow. We may try to leave this afternoon. Not going to be fun with the kids. At all. But I would rather suffer tonight than be stuck on the side of the road or even have an accident.
Hmm, how am I feeling
Hmm, how am I feeling today? Cold. And I’m going to be feeling even colder on Thursday. We are headed to Maryland for a long weekend and the high all weekend will be 38!!!!! That is freezing!! We are still in the 50s down here. Emma is so excited about going. And she is really excited about Christmas. She keeps asking if today is Christmas. And Lexi tried to rip open C&L’s Christmas present. I’m goign to have to do some damage control on the wrapping paper. We have all our shopping done except his Mom. Which she supposedly wants a leather jacket but I don’t think she has picked one out.
We watched Mr & Mrs Smith last night. It was fabulous and um, encouraging . Let’s just say Scott and I will be buying that one.
Today Kyle went to court where the guy from school charged him for assault. Looks like he has to get a psychiatric evaluation before they do any sentencing. So we’re back to waiting.
Lately I’ve been reading up on what Jews believe. I thought it was a simple difference of Christianity. We believe Christ was/is the Messiah and Jews were waiting on someone different. Way wrong. They don’t even believe the Messiah will be God or even partly God. And they believe when he comes it will basically be peace on Earth. It seems they basically believe that the first coming of the Messiah will be like what we expect out of the second coming of Christ. Just for those two reasons, it would be easy to reason that Jesus is not the Messiah. Although what they are expecting and what I believe what should be expected are two different things. So it seems in order to reconcile what to believe in, you would have to interpret the prophecies differently. Or something. I haven’t dug too deep into it except to see that the matter is not as simple as I once thought. Their faith seems to believe in a work-based faith. That as long as you repent and try to live right, then you’re good. The whole concept of being born a sinner and needing a savior outside of yourself seems to be a foreign concept. I don’t know, these concepts have been debated for years and I’m not sure I can do much except try to understand why people believe what they do. Which is why I’m really interested in finding out why I believe what I do. So this Sunday School lesson about Jesus seems to fit right in. And our teacher wants me to teach when he is out in a few weeks. I feel pretty inept but I’m hoping to do the lesson justice. It’s just weird when you put your faith in a context that is much bigger than yourself. You really do start to question if what you believe makes sense. And of course I do believe, and even more strongly believe, in what I believe but I just want all the pieces to come together. To become more clear on why I don’t believe something else just to know that I believe the right thing. Right? I’m sure lot of people have gone through the same thing. And now I can somewhat understand how someone could leave Christianity for another. If I had not experienced God myself, I can imagine from a purely textbook explanation, you could easily be swayed to something else. I have said lots of times that Christians believe some weird stuff. But I guess that what any type of religion is like. Anyway, that’s where my head has been on that whole subject.