Wednesday is the official day. I go and register Emma for kindergarten. I know I’m going to be such a cry baby about this whole thing. I was even thinking the other day that Emma won’t be with Lexi and I at lunchtime anymore. When Scott is off, she won’t be around to go run errands with us. It makes me teary eyed thinking of it!
So here’s my big stress points with this whole thing.
#1 Lunch. I have no idea why this makes me nervous but it does. I just keep picturing her having trouble putting her straw in a Caprisun and being too shy to ask for help. And then she doesn’t eat and she’s starving when she gets home and she tells me she what happened and then I realize she’s starving because she hasn’t eaten ALL DAY. Yeah, I know I’m freakin out a bit but I just want to be there to help her. As aggravating as it is to be asked 30 times a day to do something for her, I’m really, really going to miss it. OMG, I’m crying! See, this is not going to be good. It’s FIVE MONTHS before school starts and I’M CRYING. People tell me there are lunch workers and parents and teachers that will help so I’m trying to calm myself.
#2 Transportation. I’m stressing a bit about all the driving I’m going to have to do with Lexi in one place and Emma in another and all at different times during the day. I’ve thought about the bus but then I REALLY stress thinking of news stories of bus accidents. I don’t understand why there are no seatbelts in those things! For now, the bus is out. Emma wants no part in it and really I don’t either for now. We’re three minutes away from the school and Scott will be able to help out doing the driving so I’m just going with it for now. Maybe if she had an older girl in the neighborhood that could look out for her, I’d be ok. I know that has nothing to do with bus accidents but I don’t know, I just can’t handle the bus thing right now.
#3 What she’ll encounter. I’m nervous about what she’ll learn from other students that may have a bad family deal and rub off a bad attitude or maybe some bad words off on Emma. I know she’s just going to have to deal with that and learn to cope because one day she’ll be in the big, bad world and have to learn it eventually but I just don’t know if I’m ready for all these conversations we’re probably going to have to have. And I know I’m probably stressing about middle school and not kindergarten but I’m just being honest here.
And then there’s the whole school shooting/bomb thing that I think every parent must at least think about. It’s scary and it’s real.
#4 The crack of dawn morning. I have no idea how we are going to get up early enough for Emma to be at school. Right now we all roll out of bed around 8 for them to be at preschool by 9 and getting to school at 7:30 right now just sounds painful. I know we just have to go to bed earlier and get up earlier but I like my late nights, people.
#5 Lexi by herself. Lexi is really going to miss Emma. She will be in preschool but after school, she won’t know what to do with herself. Lexi can go into her own little world but most of the time. Emma and Lexi are attached at the hip. There’s definitely going to be some adjustment there.
Yes, I’ve thought about homeschooling. I know I just can’t do it with my job. I’m not that much of a supermom. If I quit working, I may think more seriously about it but even then I’m so not equipped to teach Emma. I know we have one of the best schools you can have and I’m proud of that looking forward to her learning but I don’t know. I think I would be happy with Emma home for just a little longer.