Archives for 2013

Why I’m Still Rooting for Jim & Pam

May 16, 2013 by Amy 26 Comments

I’m ecstatic to have my friend Mary from Giving Up on Perfect here today. Mary and I are Internet friends but we’ve also met in real life. She was one of my roomies from Allume. Here we are in the Smilebooth but really, we spent most of the weekend together doing just this:

Mary, me, Amanda

Mary and I love chatting TV so a post about Jim and Pam from The Office seemed just about right. But don’t be fooled, though, this post is about more than just Jim and Pam.

For those like me that quit watching when Jim and Pam got married, this post might be a tad spoilerish. But, Jim and Pam are one of my favorite couples in TV history so it was good to catch up with them even if I was spoiled a tad.

So without further adieu, here’s Mary:

When it comes to my shows, I’m an all or nothing viewer. I will watch Every. Single. Episode., or I won’t watch at all. And no matter how many times a formerly fresh and clever show has jumped the proverbial shark, I will watch loyally until the very end of the series. Usually. But every once in a while, I get so frustrated or disappointed with a show that I quit. I erase it from my DVR schedule and try to forget it even exists.

It worked with Grey’s Anatomy. [As long as I avoid those commercials!]
It worked with Big Bang Theory. [We’ll always have reruns.]
It worked with Bones. [As if I’d come back after that surprise pregnancy stunt?]

And it almost worked with The Office.

Once I began watching The Office (after co-workers convinced me I was The Only Person not watching it back in 2005), I never missed an episode. I stayed through the Stanford years and the Angry Andy episodes and the Michael and Jan insanity. I watched – and loved – it all. But when Steve Carell left, the lights went out for me. I came back the next season, but not every week. And eventually, I stopped watching at all. This is The Office’s final season, though. And if there’s one thing that will woo me back, it is a final season.

As I checked back in with the show I used to love so much, I saw major drama unfolding between Pam and Jim. Jim had started a new company in Philadelphia and was spending lots of time away from home while Pam quietly grew more and more resentful of the situation. Was it possible our beloved PB&J weren’t going to make it? As I’ve once again become a regular viewer, I’ve also started reading recaps and reviews of The Office again, too. And I have been so surprised by what I’ve found.

Apparently, after the big wedding in season six, America’s love affair with Jim and Pam started to crumble. And now, after a couple years of grumbling that Married Jim and Pam were boring, lots of those PB&J fans who cheered so loudly for the first kiss and the first date and the proposal and the wedding dance have turned on Jim and Pam.

As our favorite characters have struggled in their marriage, fans of the show became fed up. Depending on who you listen to, either Jim has always been a domineering, selfish jerk or Pam is demanding and whiny and unsupportive.

They protested, “One hug can’t fix a marriage that’s obviously falling apart.”
And they complained that Pam and Jim were trying too hard and their new-and-improved relationship seems forced.
I even read some so-called fans claim that divorce was inevitable, was more realistic and would’ve made a better story.

Well, everyone is allowed an opinion. But I disagree with all of these complaints. Sure, one hug won’t fix a marriage in crisis. But one gesture, one connection, ONE HUG might just be the thing that reminds you how much this person matters and how much you don’t want to hurt him or her. It won’t fix it, but it might be enough to push you in that direction.

As for trying too hard, I don’t see how that’s negative. Though we’d like to believe marriage is easy peasy after we say “I do,” it’s not. And what seems forced and awkward to outsiders might just be two committed people determined to work on their relationship taking the hard steps toward healing. When more than half of marriages end in divorce, the end of Jim and Pam certainly would’ve been realistic. Instead, The Office showed them taking the road less traveled and fighting for the very thing that kept us coming back week after week for six-plus years. The writers chose to give viewers a picture of hope and redemption and created a realistic happily ever after to this sitcom fairy tale.

After Jim and Pam went to counseling and eventually found their way back to each other, I was thrilled. The panic and devastation they showed each of the characters feeling, the commitment to figure it out and make it work, the stubborn set of their jaws and their hearts – it felt SO REAL.

So when they finally broke through all the junk they’d built between them and chose each other, chose to stay – that felt real, too. And, honestly, it felt like the last year of my life. Maybe I’m biased because my husband and I just went through an incredibly difficult season and, through the grace of God, chose to stay together and do the hard work, ending up stronger and happier than ever. But to me, THAT – my story and the story The Office has told us about Jim and Pam – is a real love story. And THAT is why I will never stop rooting for Jim and Pam.

I couldn’t be happier with how the writers have told this final season story of Jim and Pam. For me it’s been one of the most true-to-life and satisfying portrayals of marriage. And, I’m not gonna lie, a Jim and Pam montage – whether it’s the one Jim played for Pam last week or one I found on YouTube – will never not make me tear up. Just watch this and tell me you don’t cry just a little!

Will you watch The Office finale tonight? Are you still rooting for Jim and Pam?

Mary Carver is a writer, blogger, wife and mom. She’d rather read than clean house, she watches too much TV, and M&Ms are her love language. A recovering perfectionist, Mary writes with honesty and humor about her imperfect life at www.givinguponperfect.com. Her posts about everything from dieting and housekeeping to parenting and faith encourage other women to give up on perfect and get on with life. She also writes for (in)courage and is the author of Plan a Fabulous Party {without losing your mind}. You can connect with Mary on Twitter, Facebook, Pinterest and Instagram.

What I Wore Wednesday 5.15.2013

May 15, 2013 by Amy 7 Comments

It’s Wednesday! I share my outfits from the week with The Pleated Poppy’s What I Wore Wednesday.

I pair my outfits with inspirational photos. Read more about that here.

Email and RSS readers are probably going to need to click over to the site to see the pins.

Eek! Can you tell I got a new lens for Mother’s Day? Between that and finishing up ShootFlyShoot’s Photography 102 class last week, I’m really excited about how these photos are looking. And not me, pretty much everything but me—the lighting, the color, the background, the crispness. I can’t recommend the guys at ShootFlyShoot enough. I might just have to do a full post on it–let me know if you want to hear more!

And finally, I had to include another behind the scenes photo of Scott helping me get the lighting right. He totally soaked up all the attention you guys gave him last week. I call this his Trooper stance.

Let’s connect! Like AmyJBennett.com on Facebook (where you can see some outtakes from my pictures). Follow me on Pinterest (where I post these inspirational pictures),Instagram (where you might sneak an early peek of an outfit) or Twitter.

Which Blogging Princess Are You?

May 14, 2013 by Amy 24 Comments

I ran into this article on PR Daily which compares Disney princesses to the life of someone in PR.

While I’ve never been in PR circles, I have two girls and know the Disney Princess world well.

I couldn’t help but think about this in terms of blogging, so I just have to ask: which blogging princess are you?

princess images courtesy of Disney

Ariel – You’re ready for your blogging legs and want to be part of the blogging world. Everything is whozits and whatzits and widgets–they’re all confusing and exciting at the same time.

I wanna be where the people are
I wanna write
Wanna write those blog posts
Posting around on those
[What do you call ’em? oh, blogs!]

Oh wow, I’m so tempted to rewrite that whole song—come on, bloggers, one of you should totally do it.

Jasmine – It’s a whole new world! You’re on your carpet and up, up and away! You’re in love with your newfound hobby of blogging and you couldn’t be happier. Someone could put a whole kingdom at your feet but all you want is time with your blog.

Belle – You’re not Belle unless you love books and it shows in your writing. Belle isn’t swayed by whatever or whomever is popular in the blog world. You don’t mind standing up for what you believe in and see people for who they really are. You could care less if your blog ever gets popular–your fairytale is spending time with words and authentic people.

Rapunzel – You’re creating, creating, creating in your bloggy tower. You have your hair thrown down and are waiting for others to climb up and find you. You look out your tower window at night and dream of the days people will find you and you get your fairytale.

Cinderella – You’ve got cinders on your clothes from all the years of hard work. You’ve put up with naysayers along the way. But, it’s all paid off because you have your fairytale–you’ve found readers who like you for who you are and hope to spend the rest of their lives reading your words.

Sleeping Beauty – You’ve got a blog but sometimes you forget you do! You let it sleep for months at a time but you have hopes one day you’ll really wake up to your fairytale blogging life.

Merida– You’re not scared to let your hair down and take care of business like the big dogs. Forget the cutesy header and sidebars. You have a site, not a blog. You write articles, not blog posts. Watch out world, she’s a writer!

Tiana – You work hard for your dream to have your blog as a business. You attend lots of conferences and webinars and “affiliate marketing” should be your middle name.

Mulan – Watch out! You have WordPress and you know how to use it. You’re the techy geek with all the blogging tools in your back pocket. Your friends know to go to you for the how-to.

Snow White – You’re fairest of them all. You have quite the devoted following but that’s because you know how to work well with others and treat people with respect.

OK, what blogging princess am I missing and how would you describe her?

I tend to think I’m a bit of a Belle, Cinderella and Rapunzel. Oh, and maybe Mulan. I just read this list to Emma and Lexi and they said I was definitely Belle and Mulan and definitely not Sleeping Beauty. Well!

I suspect many of us are a mix but with which do you identify most?

See? How much fun was that?? Share it with your blogging friends, Disney lovers and your daughters—I think they’ll love it too.

A Lesson from Parenthood: Cleaning up Craft Time

May 13, 2013 by Amy 4 Comments

Now that Mother’s Day is over this year, I’m totally confessing: when my kids aren’t home, I throw away their handmade crafts.

I know, the kids would take away the flowers and cards from Mother’s Day if they knew.

But really, I just know if you’re a mom, you do this too. There’s no organization system on Pinterest that could keep up.

Your kids spend hours with paper, scissors and glue and if you’re a really nice mom, glitter, and produce something…sparkly. It really is of no practical or even decorative use but it was a great creative moment.

But then, it’s time to clean up.

You ask if you can throw it away and they’re all NO, I love that random paper plate with all the glitter on it.

I get it, I suppose. They spent a lot of creative and physical energy on it so it’s hard to give up.

And what about all the kids meal toys they’re collecting?

Can I throw away this 3” cow from Chick-fil-a because you have like 14 others?

No, do not throw it away, Mom! I got that from Chick-fil-a. I neeed it.

Really, children?

You’re not THAT mean of a mom so you don’t throw it away in front of them. But we all know–they don’t need any of it.

So, if you’re like me, you wait until they’re out of the house. You gather all the glittered paper and 3” cow. You walk out to your dumpster and and hide them at the bottom, being careful to cover up the evidence in case they take out the trash and find it. You do this don’t you? Don’t YOU??

If you’re not doing this, you totally should.

The other day it was one of those days. I found myself alone and in prime-time for clearing out.

I grabbed a garbage bag and went to town. I finished up and headed out to the dumpster.

On the way through the kitchen to the garage, God whispered. He said sometimes he clears out stuff His children don’t need too.

It’s the things that you want so bad—those things you feel like you neeed. Many times we want to hold on to that thing because we’ve invested a lot of time or energy into it. We just can’t imagine it not being a part of our lives.

But he knows you really don’t need them and you’re better off without them. Sure, they’re probably sparkly—perhaps they’re beautiful or they look fun from the outside but He knows they lead to nowhere.

Or maybe, they were just fine in the moment and served its purpose but we’ve let it stay around too long.

I can think back to times God has done this to me with a person, a TV show, a book, or even food. It’s hurt in the moment to watch it go but in the end, my life is better.

I’ve come to realize God isn’t ok with letting us settle for junk.

He moves us to a place of letting go and throwing away. We might kick and scream when we figure out what he’s doing but in the end, we’re better off.

Has God ever pruned something from your life like that? Does He need to?

Five Minute Friday: Comfort

May 10, 2013 by Amy 9 Comments

image credit

I started reading a book written by a Shepherd this week. He takes John 10 and explains each verse in devotional style, but from the unique perspective of someone who has made a living out of being with sheep.

In one particular chapter he discusses the shepherd’s unique voice. When the sheep hear an unfamiliar voice it can either cause mass chaos and confusion or they may be completely unaffected. One person can say a command and they stare at you with blank stares but the same command by their shepherd will bring instant action.

The book uses this to explain how we ought to hear our Great Shepherd. It should bring us great comfort, always knowing that His intentions are good. He never comes to bring us harm. His voice, no matter the direction, is gladly obeyed.

This trust though is built not just by hearing the voice but by hearing it and then obeying it . The sheep only know his voice is trustworthy by command after command being obeyed and seeing that it is for their benefit.

And so it is with the Lord. I pray that I don’t just know his voice but that I trust it. That it will bring comfort because I’ve obeyed enough to know that wherever he leads me is for my good.

STOP

This post is linked with Five Minute Friday.

What I Wore Wednesday 05.08.2013

May 8, 2013 by Amy 18 Comments

It’s Wednesday! I share my outfits from the week with The Pleated Poppy’s What I Wore Wednesday.

I pair my outfits with inspirational photos. Read more about that here.

Email and RSS readers are probably going to need to click over to the site to see the pins.

Y’all, I missed connecting with everyone last week for WIWW! I was so busy promoting the bundle, I took the week off but so glad to be back!

It’s been chilly and rainy here so I was back in jeans for much of the week.

OK and these next photos crack me up so much I just HAD to share (with permission). It was raining outside this weekend so we had to take my picture indoors. We have terrible lighting in our house so I asked Scott to stand in our room to see if he would stand in while I messed with the camera settings. These have horrible lighting and I didn’t even try to edit them but the pictures are hilarious.

LOL!

Oh my, he cracks me up.

Now, here’s the picture he took.

I’m still astounded how pretty fungus can be.

Let’s connect! Like AmyJBennett.com on Facebook (where you can see some outtakes from my pictures). Follow me on Pinterest (where I post these inspirational pictures), Instagram (where you might sneak an early peek of an outfit) or Twitter.

For the Mothers

May 7, 2013 by Amy 5 Comments

I watched her, that one mother, chase her fiery boy around the kitchen. He was too busy to eat the tiny chunks of hamburger she had prepared. They had an audience and I wondered if she wished he would just listen when she told him to sit down.

And I saw her, that other mother, take her blond preschooler by the hand and her toddler on the hip and walk from her car into the store. I wondered what it was they needed so badly she had to make the trek with the two on her own.

I saw that one too, with the toddler with the curly blond locks as she put her into the car seat in the back seat on the driver’s side. I heard the protests from across the parking lot and watched her switch her to the car seat on the passenger side where the booster seat waited. All grown up, she was trying to be.

I listened as that mom in the aisle told her daughter not to touch anything and break it or she might have to beat her. I smiled because I could tell she would never do that. We all have our ways of getting our points across, don’t we?

I heard the joy in that one mom’s update when she posted a picture of her two kids loving each other well. I know from experience those moments are to be celebrated.

I could hear the laughter when I read that update from the other mother telling a story of what her little one said that morning.

I sensed the beams of pride as that other mom showed “just one more” picture of her daughter at prom.

Moms, I’ve been watching. I wondered if what they said was true. That you’re brave, and strong, and loving, and wise. That all you really want is the best for your little ones. That you’ll brave supercenters and waiting rooms to make sure your kids have what they need.

And it’s all true. I’ve seen it more times than I can count.

You really are the heroes. The cheerleaders. The doctors. The chefs. The teachers. The cleaners. The judges. The artists. The wranglers. You do it all and you do it for love.

Thank you.

Know that we may be watching from the sidelines but we see you in the race, fighting for every step and we’re cheering you along. Do the thing. Finish the race. It’s worth it.

7 Ways to Recover From a Busy Season

May 6, 2013 by Amy 2 Comments

I’ve been in total recovery mode the past few days. Preparing and selling the eBook bundle (it’s over now!) totally wiped any excess creativity and energy I had. Let’s not even get to the daily life and work life that can zap your energy in a heartbeat.

Not all of us are wired the same so we won’t recover the same but I thought I’d share some of the ways I recover from a busy season.

iPhone scenes from the weekend

Take a Nap

I know this is a no-brainer that you should take a nap when you’re tired. However, busy moms have a really hard time actually doing the thing.

I often get massive mommy guilt that I’m taking hours away from my kids for purely selfish reasons. But listen, resting up is the very best thing you can do for your kids. You’re less irritable, more energetic and make a better mommy when you can rest.

I napped last Sunday while Scott and the kids were home and then took an hour to lie down at my Mom’s this Sunday. I’m better for it.

Take Time Off

I took the afternoon off from work this past Friday. No big plans, just a much-needed break from expectations and more brain power. I shirked any great expectations to clean or organize this weekend. Sure, we did the basics, but it wasn’t the time to conquer that to-do list.

I also let go of making dinners this weekend. We either ate leftovers, sandwiches or went out.

Get Outside

While there’s a time to stay in and sleep, there’s a time to get out too! Friday afternoon we went strawberry picking with the kids.

Friday evening I got out for some coffee with my friend Dani.

Saturday we got out a bit for our town’s spring festival. While it was chilly, it was good even for a few minutes to just get out and see some people.

Fresh air and happy people will do wonders.

Meet a Friend

I mentioned getting out for coffee Friday night. I’ve talked about it so many times on this site, but talking with a friend is one of the number 1 ways I de-stress and relax. I cannot stress enough how important it is to talk to someone when you’re feeling down or stressed.

The coffee doesn’t hurt either.

Read Some Fiction

I don’t know about you, but reading fiction is one of the most relaxing ways to rest. Reading requires zero physical effort (ok, you have turn the page somehow) and your mind can wander to a different world.

I’m currently reading through Glamorous Illusions.

Learn Something New

While I don’t recommend learning something new before you’ve had that nap and taken time off, I would recommend finding something new to learn once you’re on the up-swing.

I enrolled in Shoot Fly Shoot’s Photography 102 this weekend and spent some time lounging around watching the videos (photo above of me watching the videos on my iPad while playing with Bella). The rest was good but it was energizing to learn something new.

For those that bought the eBook bundle, you have a whole library from which to learn!

Renew Your Spirit

God gives us the ultimate rest. His yoke is light. Give your cares to him and fill yourself with his word. Even when our bodies are rested, our souls can be at war and this step is a must if we truly want to feel energized again.

One of my favorite parts of my week each week is attending church and it feels me to full every time worshipping and learning with my church family.

After a few days of relaxation, I’m feeling energized and ready to tackle my week. I hope you had a restful weekend yourself!

What do YOU do to unwind? Tell me in the comments.