My First Crush

Ok, this should really be titled One of My First Crushes or My First Crush on a Boy at Church or maybe even more appropriately The First Boy I Stalked.

When I was in Fifth Grade (or was it Sixth?), we started going to a new church.  We moved from a church of about 30 to 3,000.  Somewhere along the way Heather and I both developed a crush for a boy.  He. was cute.  But very, very unattainable.  Since it was such a large youth group (over 200 I think) we didn’t really cross paths except to say we were in the same room 3 times a week.  We definitely didn’t run in the same circles.  And we didn’t even go to school in the same state so we never saw each other there either. I honestly don’t think I’ve ever spoken to him in my life.  (Heather, correct me if I’m wrong.)  So I have no idea how we started liking him.  Except did I mention he was cute?

But somehow we obsessed over him.

The sanctuary was large, shaped in an arc with two stories.  Heather and I always sat in the second section from the left, first row in the balcony on Sunday evenings.  This boy always sat in the second from right section about mid-way on the floor.  And for whatever reason, we stared at him the entire time clapping and singing about how God was a Strong Tower hoping he’d look up at us.  And every once in a while he would.  And I’m very sure now trying to see if the two crazies had quit staring.  But how did we poke each other and giggle which further encouraged our stalker-like staring.

I think word eventually got around to him that I liked him.  I was told he said he wasn’t interested.  I was ugly and I looked like a St. Bernard.


Either that was a lie, he didn’t know what a St. Bernard looked like, maybe I heard through the grapevine wrong or he REALLY thought we were crazy and was exaggerating so we’d leave him alone which was highly likely.  Because as much self-confidence as I lacked, I knew I didn’t and don’t look like that.  But, I got the drift.  I wasn’t pageant material and he wasn’t interested.

But somehow we never quit looking at him, hoping he’d change his mind one day.  I left that church when Scott and I got engaged.  My family continued to go for a while and I remember going back and visiting and hoping he’d look at me and see how much I did NOT look like a St. Bernard, declare his long-time love for me and carry me off on a white horse.  Needless to say my “love” went quite unrequited.  Especially since we never, you know, TALKED.

And don’t forget to read about Melissa’s First Crush


  1. I think you just ruined my makeup for the day. That is so pathetically true!!!!! I think the ONLY contact we ever made was shaking hands ONCE during “greeting” type……geez. thanks for the ego boost.
    BTW. The St. Bernard thing…I remember something about that now that you mention it…..

    Heather’s last blog post..Friday’s Shopping Trip

  2. Haha, joke’s on him Ms. Hot Blogger! One thing I remember clearly about going to church with you around that age was it was part of the process to find him. Put on Sunday dress, check. Put on Sunday shoes, check. Youth church, check. Look for cute boy, check … (Not that I have ANY room to talk!)

    Melissa Oyler’s last blog post..When stars and Spin Doctors align

  3. Fantastic story! I love how you adored him from afar, and looked up at him on the pedestal that you placed him on. I think my friend Michelle and I did that once to some boy that we saw at a hotel once. We were there for some function, and he was there for a wedding. We didn’t even know his name so we had to make one up for him. We called him Chad. We never talked. But every time we crossed paths with him we would giggle and pretend that he secretly lusted after us.

    Whitney’s last blog post..Individually Collective Blogging: First Crush, a retraction

  4. Whitney, Melissa and I used to come up with nicknames all the time!

  5. My first crush was in fourth grade – a boy named Jimmy. I liked him so much that he became my favorite boy to bully (yes, I was a bully in elementary school). In my admiration I would seek him out at recess and pinch his arm until it was black and blue. I’d pinch and pinch until he said whatever it was I wanted him to say. Miraculously, we became friends after that (my crush moved on to a different named Jimmy in the fifth grade). My fifth grade Jimmy remained a crush throughout fifth, sixth and the first part of seventh grade. I’ll have to tell that story on my own blog.

    Jaynee’s last blog post..My 2008 Reading List

  6. I remember having a huge crush on a by named Michael…I would get my friends to come with me and ride by his house. Needless to say my crush went very much unrequited. His brother Thomas was a year older than me and let me know in no uncertain terms that Mike thought I was a tool!

  7. I always have crushes on people, so it would be tough for me to single just one out.

    However, I’ve been on both sides of stories like this, and I can say with pride that I’ve never compared anyone to a Saint Bernard.

    Elwood’s last blog post..Friday Funnies: Achievement Whores

  8. Jaynee – can’t wait to read about 5th grade Jimmy

    Carolyn – i feel your pain!

    Elwood – thank you, sir, for never comparing anyone to a St. Bernard. besides being mean, isn’t that just random?

  9. The worst part was that we were both invited to the same wedding years later and he made it a point to dance with every girl there except me. It was horrible and made me wonder what I had liked about him in the first place.

  10. Aw, Carolyn, that was so wrong.

  11. Oh I love Facebook for just that reason…I have added so many of my crushes (I liked alot of guys) and then I giggle when they accept me. I rush right over to see their pictures. Will it ever get old??

    Taylor Blue’s last blog post..The Heroes Boys Show Off Their Football Butts

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  1. […] I know all about Amy’s first crush, but I can’t wait to read her retelling of it! Read her first crush story here. […]

  2. […] For the record, Melissa and Amy’s 2nd topic happened to be “First Crushes” as well.  You can find their posts here and here. […]

  3. […] expect you to know anyone except MD is Melissa , HW is Heather (part of Joshes on HW is explained here) and SB is Scott.  I just thought reading the end 12 years later was a little bit of […]