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Lexi’s 8th Candy-Themed Party

November 5, 2012 by Amy 7 Comments

My baby girl Lexi turned 8 on Saturday. I know every parent says it every single birthday, but I really can’t believe she’s been with us 8 years.

She’s been such a joy for us. You never know what Lexi is going to say and you can be sure it’s the gut-honest truth. She’s a black and white kind of gal. She doesn’t love or live half-way.

We celebrated with a candy-themed sleepover Saturday night she’s been planning for months.

I had a little idea to do a life-sized Candy Land game in the back yard and it was so much fun to make and play.

We just had to buy a can of black spray paint for the path outline and then six cans of spray paint for the colored path—purple, yellow, green, blue, orange and red.

We used a garden hose to layout a random path and spray painted the path black. Once that was there, we lined up the other cans and just guesstimated the size of the blocks. We all took turns spraying the path.

Even the girls were able to help paint.

Although, as you can see Lexi below, she had to work to get leverage on some of the colors (so cute!) . A few of the colors weren’t available in the cheaper Walmart brand, so we had to get the ones that were a little more expensive. They were worth it though as they had a mechanism the girls could handle better and brighter paint.

We were going to go back and do another black line but we didn’t want to waste the black paint and it really wasn’t needed.

We made start and finish signs with just piece of spray painted cardboard and a printed sign.

We used the cards from the regular game to advance the play.

When I drew a Candy Land place in the cards, we would hand out a piece of candy for their goodie bags instead of them having to go somewhere else.

When a person would finish, they would get 5 more pieces of candy to add to their bag.

Definitely an easy, cheap and unique game for a party. I’m guessing you could do this with quite a bit of board games!

Lexi had a great time opening presents if these pictures give you any indication:

We had an amazing cake by Sweet Scene Cakes. When I told Sarah about the candy theme she pulled some inspiration from Pinterest and created this beauty.

She switched out the original M&Ms for Skittles and added the Peppermint Patties at Lexi’s request.

Cutting it was quite interesting. We had Skittles everywhere. I wasn’t hearing too many complaints though.

The kids loved having candy at their disposal although it was interesting they were more concerned with putting it in their goodie bag than actually eating it.

Lexi really enjoyed everyone singing Happy Birthday.

And with a blow of the candles, another birthday is under wraps.

If you ever want to make a life-sized Candy Land game, I’ve uploaded a pdf of the Start/Finish signs for you. Enjoy!

Five Minute Friday: Roots

November 2, 2012 by Amy 14 Comments

Source: google.com via Amy on Pinterest

Last night at Walmart I spent a boatload of money. Ugh. I hate that. But Lexi’s candy-themed birthday party is this weekend so we grabbed a bunch candy 50% off and then both girls needed new book bags because the ones they’ve been using just haven’t worked out. And then I went ahead and bought her gifts and all the paper products and the cookie cake I need to serve at her school lunch today. You know how it goes there.

While we were at the customer service counter before we picked out all this, trying to return a toy we didn’t use as a gift, I heard it. That western PA/MD accent that I can pick out of any crowd because every single one of extended family members speaks with it. I hear it and it transforms me to my roots, all the way from the Carolina blue skies to the Appalachian mountains where I lived just until 3 and where we return as often as we can.

She confirmed she was from Pittsburgh and we laughed an understanding laugh about the accent, how we both can pick it out from a crowd. We talked about the county where my grandmother lives, closest to Pittsburgh and she knew someone that worked there with my mother’s maiden name. That never happens here, away from my roots.

As we connected, we were in our own little world. It wasn’t two strangers over a Walmart customer service counter, it was somehow family, a knowing, a trust because even in a small way our roots were connected.

I often hope it’s the same when I meet the One in whom I am rooted. A knowing. A trust. Family.

Write for 5 minutes flat – no editing, no over thinking, no backtracking.

A Post for the Mommas

September 10, 2012 by Amy 18 Comments

Last week I read this post at Momastery. She included two letters from sister moms of infants and she wanted her readers to leave some comments with hope on how to survive the younger years. For whatever reason, I didn’t comment. Maybe because I knew nearly 500 other people would.

Saturday night we babysat my nephew’s daughter. She’s two and a half. She’s as sweet as she can be. She’s funny. She’s also independent, as many 2 year olds are. I was transported back 5 years to when my now 7 and 9 year olds were that age.

And I was glad they’re 7 and 9.

Yesterday I was at church with a couple that had a 2 year old and an infant. The dad was keeping track of the 2 year old and the mom was feeding the wee one standing right in the middle of the hallway.

While we were standing there, a frustrated momma came by with a squirming toddler on each hip. I wanted to take one off her hands, help them to nursery and then give her a nice back massage.

I’m convinced those of you reading with young ones need to hear some encouragement. You can do this. It won’t always be hard like right now. Sure, it will be hard but in different ways.

A day is coming where you don’t have to worry about anyone’s poop schedule but your own.

You won’t even have to look at poop all day if you don’t want to.

In fact, there will be weeks that go by where you don’t even care if anyone else is pooping.

A day is coming when you get to eat a meal where you don’t have to scoop even one bite of food into someone else’s mouth.

You’ll get to eat every single bite of your own food.

And better yet, none of the food will come from your own body!

In fact, since you’ve learned how to eat a dinner in 90 seconds, you’ll actually finish before anyone else instead of being the lone survivor at the dinner table.

And yes, there’s a day when all of you will sit in normal chairs around an actual dinner table. And you’ll ask questions about their day and they’ll tell you and you’ll all laugh and actually enjoy this part of your day.

A day is coming when you don’t have to be in the same room to bathe your children.

You actually get to say grab a towel and go get in the shower.

And they do it. And they know how to shampoo and conditioner their hair. AND brush it when they get out.

It’s coming, momma.

A day is coming when you don’t have to go through gymnastics to get your child to sleep.

You’ll be able to say bedtime and they know what that means. They’ll know how to brush their teeth and get their own pajamas on and read to themselves.

In fact, you’ll have to remind yourself to spend time with them at night just so you don’t miss the best part of the day. Yes! Bedtime will one day be wonderful.

A day is coming when they sleep through the night.

And sometimes, they’ll throw up during the night and they’ll just tell you about it in the morning. “Mom, I even made it to the toilet.”

Doesn’t that sound glorious?

A day is coming when you won’t even know what room they’re in when they’re playing.

You’ll have to walk around and find them and ask what they’ve been doing. And the best part is it won’t be fingerpainting the walls, unbuckling their diaper and smearing it on carpet or rubbing diaper cream all over their face.

A day is coming when you don’t have to pack 80 things to leave the house.

In fact, the kids will want to grab a few of their favorite things and you can just say, “Come out to the car when you’re ready and shut the door on your way out.”

And when they come out, you don’t have to buckle a single person except yourself.

And while you’re driving, you don’t have to entertain a single soul to keep them from crying.

A day is coming when they won’t say no every time you tell them to do something.

In fact, sometimes they’ll even ask you what they should do.

All of this and more is coming. It gets easier. Parenting gets funner. Yes, funner. But it gets that way because you did the hard work.

They’ll know how to shower because you taught them.

They’ll know how to play because you taught them.

They’ll know how to eat because you taught them.

Hang on, mommas. I know these are hard years, but they’re good years. You can do it.

Today’s my mom’s birthday so I can’t let this post go without saying happy birthday and thank you, Mom, for your hard work of raising wee ones.

Bow

August 16, 2012 by Amy Leave a Comment

Thanks to Brave and camp, Emma has this happening around the house. Watch out, neighbors, just watch out.

I think I owe Emma a thank you. Hello, sexy man with a bow and arrow.

Summer of 7 Recap

August 13, 2012 by Amy 1 Comment

Summer of 7 is officially over and I’ll be honest–I believed there was a good chance Summer of 7 was going to include a lot of suffering with minimal immediate impact and no long-term impact. But, looking back over June and July I see God absolutely all over it. Even with my mustard seed faith, He showed up. Summer of 2012 will go down as one of my favorite summers.

Today, I wanted to remember what God has done.

He taught me that He gave His best, not leftovers, and we should too.

He showed me how fear and control played into my stress and reminded me to LET GO.

We purged, purged, purged the house and found a few trigger points. My bookcases and closet are especially thankful. A few weeks later, Dani and I used the excess to fuel a Garage Sale for Orphans where $1,000 was raised. Have I shown you these photos yet?

Me and Dani

The kids ran the snack table and accepted donations

Lots and lots of people turned out to make this a success

Summer of 7 organizer, Katrina, came by!

In clothes week, God absolutely shook me to the core on clothes and makeup and reminded me of my 1,000 foot view of how we should dress.

God specifically provided for me in clothes week for my grandfather’s funeral.

He opened my eyes to “Waterfall Purchases” that I continue to pinpoint as we shop in all sorts of categories.

Spending week rocked me as He gave me a picture of being a Giving Tree and taught me that he blesses us to bless others and will continue to do so.

Waste week was a bit of a bummer but did I mention we did end up getting a compost bin the week after and have been ecstatically composting away?

In media week, he asked for a sacrifice but then provided a ram. We cut off DirecTV and soon followed with our phone bill so we could give that money for good every single month.

Even more in the last week, He tied together Grace for the Good Girl and Summer of 7 and showed me some yucky junk still going on in my heart and taught me He’s in the margin and continues to challenge me to create more margin.

Whew. What a summer. God is good.

To Katrina, thanks for organizing Summer of 7 and for coming to our yard sale and driving me to Greensboro and all your support. I’m glad to call you friend after this summer.

To Jen Hatmaker, thanks for your 7 months of sacrifice and the hard work of packaging it into a book. Oh, and all your Olympic tweets this summer. It’s all been such a blessing.

To you guys reading and my fellow Summer of 7ers, thanks for reading all the words this summer. The comments and emails and tweets are worth more than gold. Thank you for traveling this road with me.

Marriage, Broken and Beautiful

August 8, 2012 by Amy 6 Comments

Have you seen this photo yet?

It’s been making it’s social media rounds and it’s just wow. *sigh* Check out the full album here.

It’s especially sweet to see because today Scott and I are celebrating 14 years of marriage. It was a sweet day. A sweet, sweet, memorable day.

What I would say to that couple and me, 14 years ago would be this:

It’s gonna get hard. I know you’re nodding your head but it’s way harder than you think. You’re going to say mean things and think meaner things and want to get violent and walk away. You might love someone else and be just fine with not kissing him all day.

I know you can’t imagine that because right now because you’re saying We’re different. It couldn’t happen to us. But really, you’re going to wonder if you were feeling sane on your wedding day when you said I do and you’re going to wish you’d thought a little harder.

But.

Hold on.

If you just do it God’s way and forgive and assume the best and follow the golden rule and kiss anyway, the joy on the other side is a love you can’t even imagine right now. It’s as beautiful as a groom crying over his bride but soul deep. It’s a different beautiful that can’t be manufactured because it’s not made of new, but of all the broken pieces taped and glued together.

And you’ll see all the pieces are really glimpses of God.

That one piece where you loved someone else and he kept loving you anyway.

That one piece where you were mad and yelled and he kept loving you anyway.

That one piece where you ignored him and he kept loving you anyway.

That one piece where you thought about walking away and he kept loving you anyway.

Marriage is forgiveness and faithfulness and love at its best and worst. I hope you experience every piece.

To Scott, thanks for loving me anyway.

If you haven’t read my book Entangled, which is one big broken, beautiful piece of our marriage, I’d love to offer some hope in your broken. Use code 14 here and get the PDF free.

Together for Our Good

July 15, 2012 by Amy 21 Comments

I favorited that tweet by author Anne Lamott a few months back. Instinctively I knew I would need this reminder. The moment is here. A story needs telling and not everyone, including myself, will be shed in the best light. But it’s my story, my experience and I think there’s value in sharing.

If there is anything I learned while writing Entangled last year, it’s that your darkest moments shine the brightest when taken out of the shadows. I’ve had some dark moments over the last week. May I take them out of the shadows with you?

Last Wednesday morning I found out that when we were in Hilton Head doing this, my nephew broke into our house and stole 2 shot guns to pawn for money.

Scott waited overnight Tuesday to tell me because he didn’t want to see me react the way I did—a bursting of tears from the soul. Violation. Both of physical property and emotional bond.

The next 36 hours was near torture.

On Wednesday afternoon, we found out there was a 3rd shotgun taken and he admitted to it.

And then minutes later, I found my jewelry missing. Two necklaces, 5 rings, and a bracelet that Scott gave me while we were dating. My high school ring. A wedding set I wore while I was pregnant. Just as I type this, I remembered two more rings from my childhood missing. My nephew denied taking them.

Although I knew he had, I began worrying about our safety. If he truly didn’t take them, who else had been in my house? When? How? What else is gone? Do we need a security system?

I was experiencing so many emotions. I was furious that he would do this when we’ve done so much for him. My personal space felt violated in the worst way. And I was just sad for him. He knows better and I want so much more for him than this.

We debated about if and how to charge him. He’s done this before. He got arrested for the same thing just a week before we went to Hilton Head and has not been charged for similar acts in the past. It was salt on wounds that he did this yet again.

We knew he needed some consequences but ultimately know he needs the Lord. What was the best path for him? We were solely responsible for his future. If we pushed, he could sit in prison for 30 years. Would he find healing there or in an intervention program offered to him?

We talked to the detective on his pending case and got our options. By Thursday evening, my nephew decided to talk to Scott, something he had always denied him in the past. We just wanted to understand why all the stealing was necessary. He’d been out of work at times but the amount of money he had gotten was just not necessary for his lifestyle.

While talking to Scott on Friday, he confessed to a prescription drug problem and also to taking my jewelry.

When Scott told me he admitted to taking my jewelry, I’ve never experienced quite so many emotions. Validation for knowing he had done it. Hurt that he had done it. Grief knowing I would never see those meaningful pieces again. I will never be able to give my girls my high school ring. I can’t let them wear the heart diamond necklace he gave me on Valentine’s Day. I don’t even have my own choice of selling them for gold. Even relief flooded when I knew I didn’t have to worry that someone else had been in my house.

Scott decided, with counsel from many different directions, that charging him was the right way to go. He has an intervention program available to him so, if followed, he will not have extended jail time.

So as we worked Friday night to prepare our yard sale, raising money for orphans, our nephew was being booked into jail.

Life and death. I was sacrificing on all accounts.

C.S. Lewis was right. Christianity isn’t for the faint of heart.

I had every right to swear my nephew off. To say I’m done. Please don’t come near me again. But I know. I know, I know, I know that Satan is prowling like a lion. He’s here to steal, kill and destroy.

Scott told me about the jewelry just minutes before I had to go get Emma from camp Friday. That was supposed to be my most joyous moment of the week. Satan wanted to steal my joy.

Our last garage sale for orphans was planned and then thwarted the week my grandfather died. He couldn’t stop this one from happening, but he wanted to steal the joy in this one.

He wants to destroy my nephew’s life.

He wants to steal our family’s joy and unity.

He really wants us to give up on my nephew.

I hate everything Satan wants.

My only weapons against him are not hate and revenge but things like truth and love.

I believe God is a just god and that is why I have no qualms that we charged him. He ought to pay consequences. But we can’t let hate take over. Love covers a multitude of sins.

God is this beautiful balance of justice and mercy, both at full tilt, that I cannot wrap my head around.

I’ve been praying since Wednesday morning that God would give me forgiveness. I see some family members angry and bitter over things from decades past and I don’t want a life like that. It’s a miserable life to lead. Miserable for them and everyone around them.

So Scott, being the leader and general better person than me in a lot of ways, invited my nephew to church this morning. My first reaction? I really don’t care to see him and I doubt he shows. I prayed this morning that God would give me grace. Grace to a grace killer. It reminded me of Pete Wilson’s church’s reaction when they expected Westboro church to picket at Cross Point this morning.

It’s easy to gather your possessions and sell them for the orphans in Haiti. They don’t deserve what they’ve been put through. But grace to the grace killer? That’s tough.

I was anxious the whole way to church. I debated whether I’d even speak to him. Would it be so bad if I slapped him in the face one good time?

Scott dropped us off at the front of the church and I was wriggling around, trying to help the girls with leftover donuts we were taking in. When I finally got settled and turned around to go in and looked up, my nephew was standing just 6 feet away. He was early for church, showered and dressed and looking like he might be expecting a slap in the face.

As if I had no choice in the matter, I walked over and threw my arms around him and said, “I love you.” He said I love you too and apologized. I said thank you and that I was glad he was there and he said, “Me too.” I told him to wait on Scott while he parked and took the kids into church.

The girls had no idea what had just transpired. The people around couldn’t guess what was between the two people that had just hugged in front of the church doors. Just another Sunday morning greeting.

I cried most of the way through worship with Scott on my left and my nephew on the other side of him and my friend on my right holding my hand, having no clue what had been happening but knowing something was very wrong.

The preacher, not knowing what had transpired, seemed to talk directly to us. We have to let go of what we feel entitled to for greater things God has planned. Me, my possessions for my nephew’s future, and my nephew, his lifestyle for his own future.

And then we were asked to have communion—something we only do every few months.

I knew I couldn’t hold hate in my heart and take communion. I cried and prayed and asked the Lord to help me forgive. This moment would be the end of my hate. Not the end of the story, but the end of the hate. Satan is not going to win this battle. I took communion with teary eyes but a praising heart. They played 10,000 Reasons, the same song that had ministered to our family just weeks before during my grandfather’s funeral.

Church ended and my nephew and I exchanged hugs, I love yous and apologies again. I did so knowing it’s a long road in front of us. He could, and probably will, hurt us again. There are probably things from the past he’s done against us we don’t even know about.

But I know this and I want you to know it too. God is good and he works everything together for our good. Sometimes he allows us to sacrifice as he did but it’s never without purpose. In those moments, we have to open our hands from our earthly treasures and the hate in our heart so God can replace them with his good and perfect gifts. I may never have my earthly treasures but today peace and forgiveness and love and unity wins.

Saying Goodbye to Pap and a Wink from God with Summer of 7

July 1, 2012 by Amy 10 Comments

We buried my grandfather this weekend (pictured above in the center). He was a good, sweet man who worked hard and loved his family. I kept expecting to completely lose it. I expected it when I saw my mom or when we drove past his house or at the viewing or the funeral or the burial or when we drove past his house in the procession. But the truth is I just keep chanting, he’s with Jesus, he’s with Jesus. Perhaps it’s a defense mechanism or something but I just keep chanting it. He’s with Jesus. And I get to be there too one day. Jesus is our sure hope. I will miss him and my heart hurts especially for family, no doubt. But Jesus is our peace and comfort. I have felt your prayers so surely this weekend and I so appreciate them.

While we experienced the tragedy of losing our family member, many people experienced a physical storm over the weekend on the East coast. Some are saying they won’t have power for a week. Fourteen are dead at last count.

I do not claim to be the center of attention in either of these tragedies this past week but may I say that in a very minuscule way I got to see a slice of God taking care of me in my Summer of 7 endeavors related to both of them?

In the Clothing

I was in the middle of clothing week when I got the news about my grandfather and I was ready to scrap it, of course, if I needed to dress more appropriate to the occasion. As it turned out though, the viewing was on Friday and the funeral was on Saturday. Friday was my last day of clothing. And I realized that I had my black dress from one of my 7 items. I decided it was appropriate to the occasion and it gave me the ability to keep my commitment to Summer of 7. And more than that, my mom and I decided that any eye makeup was probably pointless so I went makeup-less too.

I picked those items well before we knew this was even a sliver of chance happening and I just can’t help but think God took care of that little, little detail for me when I picked out my 7 items.

In the Spending

I realized I started spending week on Saturday. We had plans to do a little shopping after the funeral on Saturday. We like to go to a few discount stores every time we visit back home and more often than not, I come home with a ton of books from one and clothes from the other–two of the main pain point areas I’d identified in my possessions week–and here I had a huge pitfall ahead making it worse.

We loaded up the car Saturday afternoon to go shopping and I was giving myself pep talks. You don’t need any books. You don’t need any clothes. And I know, know, know, the cause of the storm was not related to me but do you know the entire section of town that housed BOTH of the discount stores was ENTIRELY CLOSED due to a power outage from the storm? I mean, even McDonald’s, Walmart and the entire mall were out. The entire mall. And yes, these two discount stores.

The power outage wasn’t about me at all but it was like a prayer answered in such a unique, specialized way. I mean, what are the chances both stores would be closed on a sunny Saturday before July 4th? Let me tell you, little to zilch. But there they sat with empty parking lots and it was such a relief that it was no longer a temptation. Just writing this it reminds me of this verse:

1 Corinthians 10:13 No temptation has seized you except what is common to man. And God is faithful; he will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, he will also provide a way out so that you can stand up under it.

I could have easily insisted that we go shopping before Saturday to make sure I got my spending in—in fact, my sister joked about it—but we didn’t and just at the moment I knew I would be tempted, there was a way out.

So, I finished out clothing and started out spending week with what I felt like was a wink from God. He may not have arranged any of it for me but it felt like he used it to say, I see you. I see your sacrifice and it’s not in vain.

If that is the beginning of spending week, I am looking forward to the rest.