Archives for December 2006

Breakdown

Last night I was starting to have a break down.  Scott yelled at me to let go of the remote Lexi had in her hand because she was crying for us to put Dora on and he was going to “handle the situation”.  I immediately started crying.  I just feel so fragile and out of sorts.  Something is just not right.  I found a podcast of my old church (Central Church of God with Loran Livingston in Charlotte, NC–PLEASE check it out, it’s awesome) and every time I listen to him I’m in like tears by the end.  The two I listened to spoke about finding a local church to belong to and then finding your specific duty within the church so the body can function the way it’s supposed to.  We are very involved in church but I’ve never felt completely at home there.  I started going there when we got engaged because I knew he would not go to my church because it was so large and far away.  We have been heavily involved since the beginning but I’ve always felt like I was missing something not going to Central.  But that sermon helped and it was odd that it came from him.  He basically said you may hate the pastor or the music or whatever but it may actually NEED you to reach people.  So I’m not taking for granted that it’s definitely where we’re supposed to be but I do take comfort in the fact that you don’t have to love every single aspect of the church for it to be where you are SUPPOSED to be.  The other one talked from Titus about how people are supposed to act–young/old male/female.  Boy that was a little convicting.  How I’m supposed to act as a godly woman.  Talk about stepping on toes.  But now I just feel like I’m hanging out there…am I supposed to quit work, am I supposed to be doing something different within the church, am I the worst mother ever because I have to work while I’m at home with my kids.  Just everything.  I really feel like I just need to spend time seeking what I’m supposed to be doing.  Even if it’s doing what I am now, I just need that confirmation.

Not good

My BIL lost another job today.  Things are not looking good for SIL and BIL.  Please pray for them and all of us really.  This situation could get pretty messy.

Mastering #2

Warning: if you didn’t get it from the title, talk of poop is in this post. 

Awhile back I wrote that Emma had mastered #2.  Not so.  About a month into it, she reverted to going in her pants.  So much so she was constipated and all kinds of other nasty things that requires her now to be on a laxative every other day.  Supposedly she says it hurts her to go in the potty.  Which if you’ve seen what she does, I can’t blame her.  So hopefully this medicine will help get her back on track and I will not have to wipe up any more #2 which I about scream every time I have to.

What to do, what to do

I have money from Christmas that I don’t know what to do with.  Actually, I do know what to do with it except I need about $4,000 more to do what I actually want to do.  So I’m having a hard time figuring out WHICH thing to do with my money.  I really want a new cell phone.  Mine is the free one from Cingular that doesn’t do picture or music and is all scratched up now.  But I really want the SLVR but can’t make myself spend $150 on it.  I could just wait until my contract can be renewed until July and get a better discount but I don’t wanna wait!  And I really need some new tennis shoes and I could get an FM receiver thing for my iPod.  Or, I could go spend it all clothes shopping which would be way more fun.  But then I wouldn’t have my shoes or my cell phone.  Blah.  What a problem to have. lol

Whew, quite a work out

Made it to the gym again yesterday.  She about killed me though.  I went to this class Sweatshop that I don’t normally go to but the timing worked out.  Last time I went I said I wouldn’t go back because i didn’t like the exercises she did and I didn’t get much work out.  I peeked in and the set up looked different so I went in.  She really about killed me.  I had to stop a few times so I wouldn’t faint.  I think I kicked until my leg really wouldn’t lift to kick.  It was a great workout.  This sounds funny, but I will definitely go back to that class.  I just need to eat before I go!